Nolandhale, 59

I have had an interest in b d s m, though I did not know it by name, since I was 21. I met my wife/submissive 25 years ago and had a successful Dominant Submissive relationship when we could for 15 years. Ten years ago she started experiencing major health issues so our relationship shifted to caretaker, patient. Our Love remained deep but the dynamic changed drastically. Unfortunately I am now left alone as she recently succumbed to liver cancer. Playing with control with an underlying love was far more important to us than any type of edge play. We did explore various aspects of the lifestyle but unfortunately, as I learned how to become more dominant and controlling as we both desired, her health abandoned her and for safety, both mental and physical, it prevented us from going as deep as we wanted into the lifestyle. I will not consider anyone not in average to good health. I wish to be the head of a relationship where we get equal satisfaction in a unequal dynamic, not a caretaker. Though I prefer a healthy mental state as well, this is not the deal breaker bad physical health would be. Open and honest is the critical need I have. I am not looking for love in a traditional romance, but rather your devotion to a dominant personality. My last relationship did grow to a deep love but that was not what brought us together initially. I do prefer a 24/7 dynamic but due to my family and life, it has to appear to others to be no more than a normal relationship when not alone. My goal is control, not protocol, or pretending we are on the planet Gor, or breaking someone down to nothing. I believe that this type of relationship can end up being the most honest and fulfilling of any possibility. A submissive in the right relationship can gain clarity and confidence not available anywhere else. This does not mean that it cannot explore deep into the dynamic where those from the outside may think it's pushing boundaries that should not be pushed. That is fun! Let's chat!